future plans

Updating our circa 1990’s kitchen has always been an option on the table for us. But for several reasons we’ve decided to wait to take on this project.

For the first few years after we made the decision to wait, I was known to take the project off pause a time or twenty when we’d visit our local home improvement store. Without fail, I’d find my way over to the mock-up kitchens and jump into plan mode.

It took several of these store visits before I realized that God wanted me to see that I was in a kinda, sorta, in a round about way making future plans for something that I could not have right then.

Was it okay for me to hope for something in the future? Absolutely! Was it okay for me to want a dream to come true? Of course! But every time I took our plan to wait off of pause, my heart was making a subtle shift from desiring something totally worthwhile to desiring it more than my commitment to wait. Without even realizing is was happening, I had taken my focus off what was more important, all because I wanted what I wanted right then.

This is often how I react to God when He asks me to wait on something that I want right now. Most of the time what I’m desiring is absolutely worthy, in fact He places a lot of those desires in my heart Himself. But when my Loving Father who knows all things about the future and desires only the best for me asks me to wait and I start making future plans anyway, that is my heart making a subtle shift in allegiances.

It’s insanely easy for the heart to shift from having a worthy desire to worshipping that desire above all else. But worshipping the desires of the heart over the Divine will eventually create a divide that if not surrendered will take the heart places it was never meant to go. God wants my worship. In giving Him my worship I choose to give Him the daily desires of my heart and trust that He knows what is best for me. He wants to reassure me that He is capable of being a good Father over my life even when the plans of the future are yet to be revealed.

My prayer…

I confess that I’m not really good at waiting. I all too easily find my worthy desires turning into objects of my worship. My lips will say that I am satisfied with Your plan, but I often discover that my heart isn’t as easily satisfied. You are a gracious Father who wants reign over my heart, not because You want to lord it over me, but because You want what’s best for me. When my desires begin to run wild, I ask you to reign them in and show me how to keep them worthy. I want there to be wide open space in my heart for complete worship of You instead. I believe that complete worship can turn my heart away from making my own future plans and turn it towards You who holds the perfect plan.

🙂 Kim

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